Lost But Not Forgotten

Lost But Not Forgotten

Many years ago God put a desire into my heart to write encouraging stories which spoke of His loving-kindness so that others would want to experience His goodness. At first, I believed the dream was from Him because it glorified God and I could feel an agreement of my desires by the leading of the precious Holy Spirit. But I was too new in my walk with God to have absolute certainty that he was speaking to me.

I guess now when I look back on it, since I have a popular blog, written two books, and have almost finished with writing book one of my fantasy series, I am sure it was Him.

My story reminds me of the story of Joseph in the Bible; he had a dream.

Genesis 37:5-8 “And Joseph dreamed a dream, and he told it his brethren: and they hated him unto them, Hear, I pray you, this dream which I have dreamed: For, behold, we were binding sheaves in the field, and, lo, my sheaf arose, and also stood upright; and, behold, your sheaves stood round about, and made obeisance to my sheaf. And his brethren said to him, Shalt thou indeed reign over us? or shalt thou indeed have dominion over us? And they hated him yet the more for his dreams, and for his words.”

Joseph told all of his family about the dream that God placed within his heart. And if you know the story, you understand that His brothers, full of envy and jealousy sold him to a band of travelers who in turn sold him to the Egyptians. The relating of his dreams to others caused lots of problems for him. I am sure Joseph thought to himself when he was sold into slavery, and spending time in prison, how could God’s dream ever come to past in his life. But as the story goes on, after many tribulations, Joseph finally saw the manifestation of God’s promises come into his life.

Those many years ago, like Joseph, I made a mistake and started sharing my dream with others. When I shared my hopes, I received only negative words which in a way caused me to put God’s will for my life on hold. They said words like,  “not everyone can do work for God,” “why would you want to do that, there is no money in it,” “no one wants to read that religious stuff” and even hurtful things like, “you are not good enough.”

 By the way, I think all of us have a call from God on our lives. We just have to grow close to Him and listen when He speaks to us through the words written in the bible which come to us by revelations when reading his word. 

 However, now I want to return to my story and my unrealistic expectations of others. I anticipated those close to me and my loved ones, other than my dear mother, to be happy for me. I wanted them to help me attain my dream, but this was not the case. They wanted me to stay the same old Zola, keep hanging out with them, forget about God, and of course never speak of that religious stuff. I was ok just the way I was. Their failure to accept what I told them caused me much discouragement, so I put the dream on hold because I was not sure God spoke to me. How could everyone be wrong, I would tell myself. Nevertheless,  the desire never left me, but I put it on the back shelf of my life.

Today I will admit that I did not have the fortitude to hold onto the dream or even a close relationship with God to strengthen it. Although I remembered it at times, and my mother prayed for me daily to move towards it, life was much too busy to worry about it.

As the old proverb says,  “all good things come to an end.” Turmoil developed within my so call perfect existence, and I grew so displeased with everything. I did what a lot of people do. I cried out to God and decided again to follow Him again. This time though, I decided to yield my whole life to him. Then one day, God mightily brought back the remembrance of the dream. My mother’s prayers and the nudge of the Holy Spirit worked. The metamorphous that took place within my life, like Joseph, was not quick. It was a journey, but as time passed everything God placed within my heart grew bright again, and circumstances manifested which pushed me towards the dream.

I did learn one great lesson from this. It was that when God places a dream within us, do not be quick to share it with anyone. Satan does not want us to fulfill God’s desires, and when we quickly share our dreams and they are not deeply rooted within us, he can soon steal it by the negative words of others whom we love and trust. We have to hold on to God’s dream tightly, keep His promises near and remember always to have faith in Him and wait in patience.

Luke 18:15 “But that on the good ground are they, which in an honest and good heart, having heard the word, keep it, and bring forth fruit with patience.”

So do you have long lost dreams? I can tell you that if you ask God, He will help you dig them out of the cobwebs of your mind, and bring them back forward into your consciousness. He will once again give to your heart a deep-seated desire, and like Joseph, one day you will see them come to fruition. God wants you happy, and He wants you doing what you desire deep within your heart.

Secret, if we can be happy, then we can help others, and in turn, maybe they will be happy, and the infectious happy spirit will spread.